ORIGINAL EVENTS: (WO)MAN vs. PIE Thursday, September 06, 2012

Put away your white dress. Say goodbye to your seersucker suits. Bid adieu to those white shoes. Where you’re going, you won’t need them.

See, it’s September, which means football tailgates, the marking of the autumnal equinox and, at The Original, competitively pie hole stuffing.

For the last three years, we’ve raised money for charities by encouraging you to eat as many hot dogs as you could in just 10 minutes. This year, we’re going county fair on downtown Portland by swapping out those franks and instead challenging you to eat a sampling of homemade pies.

Here’s how it works.

On Thursday, September 20, at high noon, you and your fellow competitive eaters take your marks at our downtown diner. We’ll provide each of you with small hand pies (and plastic smocks to keep you “clean”). The first pie must be eaten only with only your face (no hands allowed). After that, it’s up to you to stuff as many hand pies into your pie hole as you can. The one who eats the most in 10 minutes will be declared the winner.

If that’s you, you’ll be rewarded with a $50 gift card to eat at the Original (once, of course, your tummy settles), plus a free overnight stay at the adjacent Courtyard by Marriott (a trip that includes free valet parking!).

But just for playing—and because everybody’s a winner—each of you will be presented a gift certificate for a whole pie to be redeemed in November, just in time for Thanksgiving.

And the reason you’re all winners? We’re raising money by encouraging you and the crowd that gathers to bet on you as the man—or woman—capable of eating the most pie.*

And this year, we’re supporting the Cascade AIDS Project (CAP), an organization that aims to prevent HIV infections, empower people affected by HIV/AIDS and to eliminate the social stigma of those infected.

Not up to competing? Come on down anyway and cheer your friends on. If you do, and donate to CAP, we’ll reward your good deed with a slice of pie on us (figuratively).

Help us to help others, by putting your money—and our pie—where your mouth is.

And don’t forget, we sell whole pies, too. So If you’ve got a special engagement in the near future and don’t have the time to whip up your own pie, give us a ring and we’ll whip one up for you!

*There are all kinds of tricks when it comes to competitive eating. When it comes to eating pie, you’re encouraged to plunge your face in that first pie, keeping it there and turning your head from side to side in order to swallow breaths between bites, rather that coming up for air over and over again. Plus, it makes for a better photograph.